Stop worrying about everyone else.

Loving yourself is about complete forgiveness, and acceptance for who you are deep down. This includes all of the parts of yourself that you find hideous and includes the parts that you find beautiful too. In order to love yourself, you have to take care of your needs. How can we expect others to do for us if we will not do anything for ourselves?  It sounds a little redundant, I know, but this is true. If you stop considering your own feelings, you will lose what makes you special. It is so important to maintain not only your inner thoughts, but your body and life as well. It is easy to point out our flaws, but sometimes these flaws are what others like most about us. I have gone through many moons of self renovation, and I am experiencing another challenging chapter of my life just as I write.

“The world is a lot bigger than petty small problems, focus on the good and move forward.”

I am realizing as time moves forward that I can expect nothing of anyone else but myself. That sounds a little harsh, but how can I expect certain behavior out of others if I am constantly hiding what I have to say? This last year of my life has been an amazing and terrifying chain of events and I am leaving my negative thoughts in 2017 where they belong. It is so easy to set resolutions and pretend we’re going to stick with plans, but in reality if I don’t do what I say, how good is my word really?

This article is about challenging yourself. I don’t mean to challenge yourself physically, but open your mind and your heart to other perspectives. I personally know that it is very easy to become so self involved that you become miserable. How can you become self involved and not be conscientious of your needs? Good question. The type of self involved that I am referring to is worrying about what others think and feel far too often. I personally have a problem thinking on what others do or say, and honestly I tend to get carried away. It is so easy to let anger, sadness, and frustration take control of your thoughts, and it is worse when these things trigger your actions too.

This is what I have started to tell myself when others pass judgment about me (or I even just assume that they are). “You are you, and you have no control over the perception of others. As long as you know that you’re doing the right thing and being a good person, you should not ever be upset as a result of lies or drama.” 

My heart is always open to caring and helping others, and it is to a fault. I love people. I’m not going to lie, I feel like I invest so much of my heart into every person I meet. It’s what I do! I want every person in this world to experience happiness and a joyful life. I am realizing now that I have no ability to control someone else’s emotions. I do however, have control of my own. I can choose not to be angry and that is my choice, but to even think that we have the opportunity to change anyone’s heart is silly. I cannot change what is in your heart, and I cannot take away your struggles. You also cannot take on my luggage either.

We must take on our own problems one day at a time. Until we realize that we are only in control over ourselves, we cannot and will not be satisfied and happy. So my challenge today is for you to take some alone time and draw a hot bath, or go out to eat by yourself. You deserve to have your own thoughts. You deserve to worry about only yourself for a moment. There is no reason for you to take away every second of your own time and give it away freely to everyone else. YOU are the only person that values your time, and the sooner you realize that the easier life will be for you.

You are a beautiful soul and you have a loving and wonderful heart. Please don’t waste your life worrying about problems that will not matter a year from now.  The world is a lot bigger than petty small problems, focus on the good and move forward.

 

-Taylor J.

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